Sunday, February 23, 2014

Entry #85 - SEE YOU THEN, JOSHUA JACOBS

Title: SEE YOU THEN, JOSHUA JACOBS

Genre: Contemporary MG

Pitch:

Soon-to-be seventh grader Suzie Martin is happy to find a friend in the new boy in the neighborhood, science prodigy Joshua Jacobs. He makes friendship – something Suzie’s never quite gotten the hang of – look easy. She looks forward to a great year, until she learns Joshua believes his dead father visits him through time travel.

As the news spreads, she must decide whether to stand by a friend she doesn’t believe even if it means losing her newfound acceptance at school, standing up to the school bully, and defying her own family. In a few short months, Suzie learns more about friendship, fear, hope and the spacetime continuum than she ever thought possible.

First sentence:
There was nothing about you, your mother or the moving truck to warn me about what to expect from you, Joshua Jacobs.

2 comments:

  1. The pitch is cool (though if JJ's dad really is time travelling then it's not a contemporary).

    I was a bit put off by the first sentence with the use of the word 'you.' Is it a diary entry? Why is the narration talking to a character?

    There was nothing about him, his mother or the moving truck to warn me about what to expect from Joshua Jacobs. works way better for me.

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  2. Judge comment: I love the bit about the space time continuum. You might try reading the entire thing out loud, however -- the story isn't confusing but the way it's written makes it a little hard to follow. I'm also wondering if the second paragraph needs a little more punch. What sets this "learning a lesson" story apart from all the others?

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