Sunday, February 23, 2014

Entry # 72 - ROGER FIREBUG


Genre: humorous MG contemporary 


Roger “Firebug” Frieburg spends a lot of time in the middle school principal’s office and has his eye on his best friend’s crush, but it’s his artistic ability and love of pit-firing ceramics that earns him his new nickname. Unfortunately, when an at-home art experiment goes awry, the fire department doesn’t find his nickname very cool or funny. And when his brother is abruptly fired from the local restaurant and the building mysteriously burns to the ground, Roger looks just like an arsonist- not an artist. Small town secrets are revealed and friendships shift as Roger tries to prove he is not the real firebug.

First Sentence: 

I think I just burned my eyebrows off.


  1. I love the premise and the first line. It's always so much fun to read a story with a subject that's not out there at the moment. I've always heard that "there are no new ideas" but there are, there really are. Good job! Pete (#63)

  2. I love the first line! It would definitely grab my attention.

    It was a bit jarring to see that friendships shift in the last sentence when I don't know about any of these friendships (other than Roger liking his best friends' crush). Can you give us a little more? I'm guessing the girl helps try to prove his innocence-does his friend think he's guilty?

  3. Love the first sentence. Nice tone setting for the story. It'd be cool to see a bit more humour like that coming through in the pitch.

  4. Judge comment: The first sentence made me actually LOL. It would be great if you could work some of that humor/tone into the rest of the pitch. The last line falls a little flat after such a great premise -- you might make it clearer how the friendships shift, or hint at how the secrets revealed play into the larger story and theme.

  5. Judge comment: I can see it has a lot of heart! The one thing bothering me is that I can't decide on the tone. Is it funny or serious? The opening line is awesome, but if the humor continues, it makes a promise to the reader.


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