tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5090356376347540893.post4927525607738377255..comments2023-06-24T08:30:59.493-04:00Comments on Adventures in YA Contests from: Entry #34: DAUGHTER OF THE DISGRACED KINGMartina Boonehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03358736828122139189noreply@blogger.comBlogger3125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5090356376347540893.post-85688616664266868672014-08-30T20:35:32.805-04:002014-08-30T20:35:32.805-04:00Hmm, I foresee something unexpected happening at t...Hmm, I foresee something unexpected happening at the ball and thwarting Sav's plans. I also like the dual POV; it gives the relationship more depth. I felt more connection with Sav than Ailsa, but I think this is because Ailsa's POV is mostly description and Sav's is mostly dialogue/character interaction. I felt like the scene where Sav is trying to ask her goes by a little too quickly. Maybe build up to this more? Like showing how nervous he is before he grabs her hand and starts talking.<br /><br />Good luck!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5090356376347540893.post-20671911193865986852014-08-29T14:53:40.874-04:002014-08-29T14:53:40.874-04:00I enjoyed the dual POV also. Really adds dimension...I enjoyed the dual POV also. Really adds dimension to the relationship. <br /><br />Small comment on the opening: If the dead and dying trees in the heart of a forest are such a great danger to the realm, I would have liked to get a more visceral view of them. Especially if the story will hearken back to this underlying problem later. Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14820659522541825744noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5090356376347540893.post-47450092571551840062014-08-28T12:54:03.968-04:002014-08-28T12:54:03.968-04:00I really enjoyed the world building here, and I lo...I really enjoyed the world building here, and I love dual POVs. I felt like my connection really picked up with the race scene, with nice drops of information without it being too much. I did wonder why she thought no one would flirt with her, and I thought Sav's voice was the stronger of the two. I would definitely keep reading!Laurie Dennisonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01089552813955890768noreply@blogger.com